Who Knew My Bra Would Be Mistaken as a Weapon of Mass Destruction?

Filed under: PSI Shows, Personal, Travel

Gutentagen from Frankfurt, Germany! It’s 6:00 a.m. here and I’m at the airport on my way to Dusseldorf for the PSI Show, Europe’s (and, in fact, the world’s) largest ad specialties show.

Starting tomorrow, the show is set to welcome 21,000 attendees visiting over 500,000 square feet of exhibitors’ booth space. It is huge, it is wildly impressive and it is one of the best-run shows I’ve ever been to, featuring the year’s most innovative and chic product designs on display. It’s here where you see the creativity first, before it gets knocked off in China.

The flight from Philly to Frankfurt lasted almost eight hours, which is a cake walk compared to the 18-hour special brand of airborne hell I’ll be on in April when I fly to Asia for the Canton Show and Hong Kong Gift Fair. Let me know if you’re going… We can plan on medicating together!

The flight was also unexpectedly pleasant… I fly so often that I’ve become a jaded, bitchy traveler, one who sinks sullenly into her own fur coat on the plane rather than interact with anyone, and who listens to her iPod with a distinct “Disturb at Your Own Risk” aura enveloping her.

But on this particular flight, I sat with a 10-year-old German boy named Jannick (his parents were a few rows behind us) who was so precocious he told me he wants to grow up and live at Disneyland, but commute daily via his own plane to Wall Street where he’ll be an investment banker. This child was so self-assured, I have no doubt he’ll do it. Rock on, my little Gordon Gekko!

Next to him was 20-year-old Ryan from Cherry Hill, NJ, who was going to Europe for the first time to attend school in France for five months. He was so enthusiastic and full of optimism, I thought he was adorable. Or, maybe it was the fact that he asked if I was “a grad student.” God bless dim boys and dimmer airplane lighting. If it wouldn’t have bordered on a felony, I would have kissed him on the spot.

The three of us had a delightful time watching movies in sync, so much so that when I disembarked the plane, I had a renewed zeal and zest for travel. Right up until the point when I set off the metal detectors in the security line in Frankfurt. What was the reason, you may wonder? That would be my underwire bra, which — when the security agent waved the wand over me — sent the alarms screeching. Of course after a spectacle like that, the hands-on body search is imminent.

I will tell you: There’s nothing quite like entering a foreign country at 6:00 a.m. and being felt up by a burly German woman. At least she could have sprung for flowers and breakfast… ; )

Cheers and more tomorrow from Dusseldorf, where I will be staying aboard Polyconcept’s floating hotel boat, as a guest of the ever-suave and charming Philippe Varnier, the company’s chairman/CEO, and my favorite dance partner, Yann Leca, its CFO. Can. Not. Wait.

– M


You Say You Want a Resolution…

Filed under: Fun, Personal

Happy Holidays, Everyone!

As I type this in the last remaining days of 2008, I’m full of hope and optimism. Yeah, there’s the fact that we’ll soon have a president who uses three-syllable words without making us cringe and knows that the Bill of Rights isn’t a list of suggestions. But in addition to that, I’ve always been a fan of that clean slate feeling you get at the start of a brand new year — like shaking an Etch-a-Sketch that erases all the crappy, idiotic things you’ve done throughout the previous one. And while I’ve never been one to ponder things pensively in retrospect (I’m more of a “let’s get on with it and move forward” kind of girl), I do have some resolutions for 2009, most of which I will have selectively ignored in roughly two weeks.

1. Stop procrastinating. To be clear, there are few tasks that I don’t put off until the very last possible minute. There’s probably some clinical, psychological term for this, though Joe Haley, the managing editor of ASI’s magazines, has his own description for the special brand of hell it causes him when my magazine is in production or a profile I’m writing isn’t finished as we’re literally going to the printer the next day: “When you’re on deadline,” Joe sighs, “a little piece of me dies every day.” Rather than work on a profile for an issue of Counselor, I once WILLINGLY watched a marathon of “The Hills,” that insipid reality show on MTV, starring mentally deficient pretty people in all their vapid, moronic glory. It was an eight-hour marathon and I watched it all. I know… I need to be under the care of a whole team of mental health professionals.

2. Get organized and prioritize. Instead of methodically tackling one project at a time, my strategy is more akin to a drunken baby wielding a shotgun and firing off scattered rounds. I jump from project to project, until the end of the day when I have different items in various states of completion. I’m sure I have some ADD/OCD/ADHD issues that keep me from concentrating for any length of time for which I should seek medicinal relief – and God knows I’m not opposed to pills — but it just seems so, I don’t know, trendy to blame one’s inability to focus on some sort of short-circuiting brain waves. Crazy I can deal with; cliche is another story….

3. Be better at keeping in touch with friends. To say I’ve been remiss in this area is putting it mildly. You know what it’s like — deadlines, travel, endless happy hours… and then the year’s over. I sent my Goddaughter a card last month wishing her a “Happy 13th Birthday!” That’s all well and good, except she’s 15 and I was there, in the room, when the child was born. Time flies when you’re being a spaz and not paying attention…

Do you have any juicy resolutions? I’d love to hear them, so please do share! My favorite so far? Michael Bernstein, the vice chairman of Counselor Top 40 supplier Polyconcept and my most beloved of all my BFFs, shared his “greatest weakness and indulgence” with me recently: “Cigarettes and you, Michele.” Here’s hoping he doesn’t give up the latter!

By the way, a hearty thanks to all of you who e-mailed me — after reading of my penchant for “sloth,” one of the deadly sins, in my last blog posting — that the History Channel is featuring a new series, “Seven Deadly Sins” week starting on Monday, 12/29 at 9:00 p.m. EST, spotlighting one sin on each of the seven nights. They have an ironic sense of humor over there at the History Channel — the week kicks off with a bang tonight with ”Lust,” “Gluttony” is on New Year’s Eve and my beloved ”Sloth” is on New Year’s Day. I will be commemorating the High Holy Day for lazy, self-indulgent people everywhere with some celebratory napping.

So I hope you all have a fabulous 2009 and I look forward to seeing you at upcoming shows! I’ll be at the PSI Dusseldorf Show (Europe’s largest promotional products show — so huge, in fact, that it dwarfs the PPAI Vegas Show) next week, the always-awesome PPACanada Show in Toronto from January 23-27 and the ASI Dallas Show from February 4-6 (one of my favorites), and will be a blogging and photo snapping fiend at each show. If you see me, come over and say hi!

In conclusion, I’d like to think that Hunter S. Thompson, the crazy gonzo journalist, excess-embracing loon and one near and dear to my heart, had it right when considering one’s goals in life: “Maybe it all comes down to this,” Thompson said. “Laughing loud, drinking much, sleeping late, having fun, getting wild and driving fast on empty streets with nothing in mind except falling in love and not getting arrested.”

So here’s to an awesome 2008 and an even better 2009, aptly described with some lyrics from a song that always epitomizes optimism and hope to me, from the musical “Rent,” about a year in a life… 

Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes,
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Moments so dear.
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes
How do you measure, measure a year?
In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights
In cups of coffee
In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife.
In five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes
How do you measure
A year in the life?
How about love?
How about love?
How about love? Measure in love

Cheers and Happy New Year!

– M


A Few of My Favorite Things…

Filed under: Editorial, Fun, Personal

Hi Everyone –

As we’re in the midst of the holiday season and the year’s almost finished, I’m going to take a page out of Oprah’s book and devote some time to a sampling of the coolest items that wowed me this year and made me swoon — both from in and outside the industry. Unfortunately, unlike Oprah, I won’t be giving away any cars, houses or bras.

So here, without further ado, are my favorite things (note that “raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens” didn’t make the cut… ; ) ).

More next week and cheers!

– M

PS: If there were any wow-worthy products that you found this year, post them below — I’d love to see them!

If I was giving out an award for “Most Creative Ad Specialty of 2008,” this would be a lock because it ROCKS. On one side of the plastic card there are perforated guitar picks that can be imprinted with any custom design or logo; the back has room for your name, phone number and e-mail address. How’s that for the coolest businesscard EVER?
Available from Pikcard; (800) 596-7074 (ext. 303); www.pikcard.com

I love that this photo keychain wallet is small enough to be unobtrusive but dainty enough to be cute. As I don’t have children (something that causes scores of people to cheer) I could put a photo of each of my kittens — Monkey and Mouse — in these heart-shaped photo slots. Well, if not for the fact that my editorial colleague Joe Haley, the star of The Joe Show, staunchly maintains that I’m only six months away from being a full-blown Crazy Cat Lady, “dressing them up in doll clothes and having weirdo little tea parties.”
Available from Express Pens (asi/53411); www.expresspens.com

I can talk the ears off corn, but for some people, making conversation — especially at a networking event where you don’t know anyone — is the equivalent of gargling with shards of glass. These cards, though, make it easy. They ask personal questions (”What movie made you laugh until you cried?” My answer: The Birdcage), business questions (”What would you like to add to your job description?” My answer: Maintain a consistent napping schedule), and even custom questions that can be created for your company, which are sure to get people talking.
Available from Custom Topics (404) 815-0272; www.customtopics.net

The excessive bling surrounding this travel mug just screams “diva,” which is exactly what this diva does when she doesn’t get her way. I love that you could be drinking your favorite beverage and simultaneously check to make sure that your lipstick isn’t smeared like a demonic, crazy clown.
Available from Berney-Karp Inc. (asi/40261); www.ceramic-source.com

From Selco’s “Hard Core” line of edgy, street-inspired timepieces, the “Flaming Ice” is just so rock star cool. Using three-dimensional casting, authentic mother-of-pearl, Swarovski crystals, diamonds and white steel, this wearable work of art is signed and serialized by the artist, Steve Soffa.
Available from Selco (asi/86230); www.selcotime.com

From the company I’ve adored — for a multitude of reasons — since I first started in the industry, this combination iPod docking/charging station, mini-stereo, AM/FM radio and alarm clock works with all iPods (including iPhones) and some MP3 players. The alarm clock features snooze/sleep functions (which those who embrace sloth as I do just love…), three alarm settings and a detachable remote control that operates the snooze function and iPod/MP3 player.
Available from Leed’s (asi/66887); www.leedsworld.com

I have a lot of fun toys in my office, which attracts co-workers to come in and play — they compare it to “Wonkaville” or Fantasy Land. This unique note holder just adds to the mix.
Available from PromoBiz (asi/79903); www.promobizusa.com

Oh, let me count the ways I love Lexon, a Paris-based industry supplier. Quite simply, its products are so beautifully designed they make me want to weep. I learned about Lexon years ago, when I traveled to Paris in 2000 with some Norwood friends to see the debut of Lexon’s new line and to be there when its iconic “Tykho” rubber radio (shown here) — which had just scored the cover of Time magazine’s “Design” issue — was inducted into the Louvre as one of the “Best Designed Products of the 20th Century.” Since then, when I see Lexon’s items at the PSI shows in Dusseldorf or Paris, I make a beeline to the booth, find the company’s impossibly-charming owner, Rene Adda, and worship at the altar of his breathtakingly-designed offerings. As I consider every one of their items to be an objet d’art, just check out their swanky Web site, www.lexon-design.com, and prepare to be wowed.
I am a huge fan of Swarovski’s jewelry line and consequently love any product that uses its crystals as embellishments. Here are two: a delicate jeweled box covered in crystals and a singular sparkler discreetly placed in one of the most stylish pens I’ve ever coveted.
Available from Logomark (asi/67866); www.logomark.com

This just brings me back to the days of frivolous fun, when all it took was Sea Monkeys, pet rocks and invisible dogs to make me giggle with delight. Will this Magic 8 ball, which can be fully custom imprinted on its surface, amuse the frak out of anyone who receives it? “The outlook is good… .”
Available from Prime Line (asi/79530); www.primeline.com

As the joke goes here in the editorial department, my partying has taken such a toll on my looks (so says my mother, Judge Judye) that I have to spackle on my make-up with a putty knife. This fashion-forward cosmetics and toiletries bag is large enough for all my smoke-and-mirrors tricks of the trade. Just avoid looking at me in direct sunlight…
Available from Gemline (asi/56070); www.gemline.com

If you know me, you know that I’d rather have my spleen removed with a soup spoon than deal with math on any level. This Hydraulic calculator has such a whimsical bubbly shape that it numbs the pain of interacting with numbers for me. It features a calendar, month, time, time zone display, world time for 16 cities and two alarms, a robotic “open” slide and comes in metallic blue (my favorite) and silver.
Available from Dard Products Inc. (asi/48500); www.tagmaster.net

One of the (many) banes of my existence is how my jewelry — especially my necklaces — gets tangled together. This sleek and sexy jewelry stand is the perfect, unique remedy.
Available from Steel Threads (asi/89475); www.steelthreads.com

This handy pill carousel is the perfect item for those near and dear to me here at ASI who have to deal with my antics, listen to the nonsense that flies out of my mouth on a daily basis, and self-medicate with Advil (or stronger) because of it. This list of long-suffering souls includes, but is not limited to: Every member of the editorial department, but especially Joe Haley, Andy Cohen and Melinda Ligos; in-house tech geek Jeremy Young; senior Web developer Samantha Tucker (the saint who posts these voluminous blog manifestos for me), COO Vince Bucolo; senior vice president Rich Fairfield; and last but certainly not least, president/CEO Tim Andrews. Help ease their pain with this bright white pill case with a translucent blue lid and seven compartments to hold a week’s worth of medications. The wheel rotates at the push of a button and there’s a combination lock to discourage sharing.
Available from Sweda (asi/90305); www.swedausa.com

When I saw this, I thought, “that is just one of the most unique ideas, even if it’s something I wouldn’t use.” Why wouldn’t I? Because I’m more of a soaking-in-a-hot-bubble-bath kind of girl. This item is ideal for local governments, hotels, eco-groups, water companies or anyone touting the conservation of natural resources through limiting one’s shower to five minutes.
Available from All-In-One (asi/34256); www.allinoneline.com

Want to bring the bling? Do it in over-the-top style with this rhinestone-studded dogtag, shown here in a Sex and the City design. My crazy chica pal Julie Ditchik (that’s “Jules” to you and me…) gave this to me at the SAAC Show in Long Beach this past August and I cherish it!
Available from Pinnacle Designs (asi/78140); www.pinnacledesigns.com

And now, some items for the degenerate in us all (or at least the people to whom I gravitate). When the economy goes bad, sin is in, my little heathens — though in Michele World, it always has a place of honor. Here then, are some gift suggestions for those of us who know the special pleasures of being bad… ; )


In case you didn’t know it, music begins and ends with the Rolling Stones in my book. I stand in awe of Mick’s ability — in his mid-60s — to strut around the stage like a chicken in little leather pants singing lyrics like “I used to be your rooster, now I’m just your c**k” and truly believe that miracles do exist, if for no other reason than the fact that Keith — looking remarkably simian, like he’s de-evolving — abides. Throw my love of The Stones together with my love of wine and you have quite the potent combination for revelry and mayhem. This company’s offering of Rolling Stones wine, available in many different types (Chardonnay, Pinot, etc.), all feature the notorious tongue and lips logo that was first introduced on the band’s classic 1971 album “Sticky Fingers” — the one whose cover had a photo of pants with a real zipper that actually unzipped at the crotch and that was the first album I bought, at the age of 13, much to my mother’s profound horror. The Classic Tongue “brand” perfectly captures the unabashed hedonism of the World’s Greatest Rock ‘N Roll Band.
Available from Celebration Cellars (asi/44366); www.celebrationcellars.com

And speaking of The Stones, one of my favorite songs from the Glimmer Twins is their ode to “Mother’s Little Helpers.” This whimsical “Quaaludes” cookie jar is from the hip and haute housewares designer Jonathan Adler, often featured in Vogue and a judge on Bravo TV’s “Top Design.” His tongue-in-cheek stance is to embrace excess with one of his candid canisters — perfect as gifts for all your wicked friends and favorite psychopharmacologists. Offered in black & white and powder blue & chocolate stripes (the version that currently sits in my office), this comes in other hilarious variations (”Downers,” “Uppers,” “Dolls”) and is ideal for when you’re beyond denial and want to stash in style.
Available from Jonathan Adler: www.jonathanadler.com

As the saying goes, one person’s virtue is another person’s vice. However, thanks to Captain Buzzkill — Pope Gregory I — we’re all saddled with perpetual guilt surrounding the Seven Deadly Sins: Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Wrath, Envy and Pride. Now, while I’m sure I commit each of these on a daily basis, I’d like to take a moment to give a special shout-out to the one I hold near and dear to my heart: Sloth. If I’m riding the Highway to Hell, I’d like it to be because of my prodigious laziness. And though the sins remind me of that supremely creepy Brad Pitt/Morgan Freeman/Kevin Spacey movie Seven (guest-starring Gwyneth Paltrow’s boxed head), I still crave this “Seven Deadly Sins” gift set from D.L. & Co. Lighting the candles would be like paying homage to my Id.
Available from Gift Genius www.giftgenius.com

Life (at ASI) is a Cabaret…

Filed under: Fun, Personal

Hi Everyone –

I’m leaving tomorrow morning to spend the Thanksgiving holiday with my family, who have a home in Sanibel, Florida. While I will be reveling in the warm weather and limiting my mother, Judge Judye (again, she doesn’t preside over trials, but she is judgemental, in that special way moms can be… ; ) ) to three nags per day, I wanted to share with you photos from ASI’s first annual ”Roaring ’20s” Cabaret night. An aside: I really don’t know if this will be a yearly event — it’s more just me being hopeful in case the Powers that Be (that’s you, Tim Andrews!) are reading…

With “bootleg” cocktails, gangster hats, feather boas and flappers in abundance, I can tell you that this event — hosted by president/CEO Tim Andrews and ASI’s “Fun Committee,” was one for the books. Now, for those of you who know me, I’m not the type of girl to be overly-effusive, but I had a BLAST! (And not just because wine was involved…). 

The evening was hosted by American Idol finalist Justin Guarini, who could not have been a more gracious, engaging host, and featured some of ASI’s best in-house “talent” singing karaoke. Justin, incidentally, is the spokesperson for industry supplier BamBam’s (asi/38228) trademarked “Rollabana” so he’s already “in the know” about the ad specialty business.

Here, then, are a wide variety of photos — the good, the bad and the disturbing (you’ll know it when you see it, but it involves my tongue hanging out of my mouth like a hungry basset hound). It will definitely explain why people truly enjoy working at ASI, and why many — including myself — stayed for so many years.

Happy Thanksgiving and more next week!

Cheers!

– M


With hundreds of ASI employees in attendance, the company’s first-ever Cabaret Night was a “roaring” awesome time.
(From left): Web designer Steve Hawk, the man working the soundboard for ASI Radio with the skill of Brian Eno, and Craig Veltri, senior Web designer for ASICentral.com, get their gangster on.
Sometimes, the quiet ones are the best surprises… Jason Cissorsky, whom I’ve had the pleasure of seeing sing karaoke to the elegant and refined, “I’m Too Sexy for Your Hat, Too Sexy for Your Cat,” wowed the crowd with his rollicking rendition of “The Devil Went Down to Georgia.” And for his fabulous efforts — which included a festive jig during the song’s famed instrumental segues — he won “Best Solo” for the night.
Mike Morris leads a bevy of back-up singers to a rousing rendition of Neil Diamond’s “Sweet Caroline.”
(From left): ASI Show advertising coordinator, the one and only Karen Wynn and exhibitor accounts manager Kristen Metzner showing off their miles of smiles.
If there was a prize for snappiest attire, this guy would have won it, hands down.
Amanda Swartz belts out “Black Velvet,” which garnered her the Grand Prize.


Here’s Rich, rocking out to “Addicted to Love.” Just so you know, this is exactly the expression he has on his face when he tries to locate me at shows and has to bellow my name in random bars… ; )


Rich Fairfield, ASI’s senior vice president, publisher and my beloved boss [read: He has a high-tolerance for my bulls**t and antics], emulating the best-dressed man in rock, Robert Palmer, doing “Addicted to Love.” Behind him, as the ever-stoic though supremely sexy chorus line, are (from left): managing editor Joan Chaykin, editor-in-chief Melinda Ligos, director of ESPOnline Candace Hershey and my girl Dana Reaume (LOVE her!!!), ASI’s professional development coordinator. Rich wanted me up on stage, though I declined because I have legs like a corgi.


I love the composition of this shot, taken by my pal Jason Kuttner, of managing editor Joan Chaykin and my boss, ASI publisher Rich Fairfield, during his karaoke rendition of Robert Palmer’s “Addicted to Love.”


Tim Andrews, making a definitive point — which is not always easy to do while donning a boa… LOL).


ASI president, CEO and kissing bandit Tim Andrews, shown here with the lovely and talented Jessica Fletcher, ASI’s electronic communications coordinator.


One of ASI’s newer charismatic personalities, meet Lori Cohen, shown here on the left, singing a bringing-down-the-house performance of “Nine to Five.”


Michelle Motz and Rob Fiorello took the prize for “Keep Your Day Job” (they had a lot of competition).


Jim Maratea, ASI’s building operations manager, belts out “Born to Be Wild,” a sentiment both he and I share…


My pal Jessica Fletcher, left, shown here with editorial staff writer (and Joe Haley’s “bromance” BFF) Matt George and managing editor Joan Chaykin.


ASI’s distributor sales manager Stan Fellerman, shown here with the lovely Mary Laycock, Dale Denham’s assistant. And for that reason alone, Mary should have had at least three drinks… ; )


Barbara Ambrose, executive assistant to senior vp/publisher Rich Fairfiled, looking fabulous flapper attire. Barbara rocks, and is one of the people who helped decorate for Cabaret Night… Twenty-three skiddo, Barbara!


ASI’s CEO & president, Tim Andrews — proudly sporting a boa — welcomes everyone to ASI’s first Cabaret Evening.


Dale Denham (right) pulled me up on stage to get a photo of the two of us with Justin Guarini. Look at me in the center… I appear to be from the Land of Lilliput.


(From left): Advantages editor Kathy Huston, editor-in-chief Melinda Ligos and associate editor Jen Zorger, all my super-awesome editorial chickies. Interestingly, they are like an ascending scale of loud — Jen being the quietest and Kathy, well, being Homeric.


ASI’s editor-in-chief Melinda Ligos and president/CEO Tim Andrews raise lit candles in support of an encore from Joe Haley.


(From left) Donna Brauning, Tim Andrews’ executive assistant, Joe “The Crooner” Haley and I. I consider it a personal accomplishment that my tongue remained firmly planted in my head.


Editor-in-chief Melinda Ligos and ASI senior vice president and publisher Rich Fairfield, both of whom I report to and both of whom have compared managing me to “attempting to control the wind.” Next time you see them at a show, buy them a sympathy shot.


The tongue wag that launched a thousand “icks.” Here’s me, on the left, inexplicably looking as though I’m going to lick poor Joe Haley, shown here with Melinda Ligos, like taffy. I think if that keeps up, my little Joe-Joe may slap me with a TRO… ; )


Joe Haley, with his tumbler and cigarette props, could be a founding member of the Rat Pack. If only he had the smooth-as-silk way with the ladies…. ; )


Joe Haley, shown here with his new BFF Justin Guarini. Word has it that Joe plans to let his hair “sprout” just like Justin’s! Can. Not. Wait.


And here, my friends, is where the evening took a decidedly wacky left turn… Joe Haley, ASI’s managing editor, star of The Joe Show and one of the three people at ASI who can tell me to “Shush” without fear of evisceration (the other two — in case you were curious — are Christian Brandt, ASI’s executive director of distributor services and Jeremy Young, our IT “guru” and my cocktailing partner in crime) sashayed on stage, donning full tux, hat, tumbler of scotch and (unlit) cigarette, to croon Sinatra’s “My Way.” Now, you should know, Joe CANNOT sing one note; however it was his bravado — complete with a hat-toss and cigarette flick into the crowd — that brought down the house. If I haven’t told you lately, Joe-Joe, YOU ROCK.


Tim Andrews playfully hides behind his boa and gives me one hell of a come-hither gaze — so much so that I blushed and got weak-kneed. ; )


Karyn Coates (Executive Director of E-Media and Member Benefits), whom I will maintain to my dying day bears a striking resemblance to the hottie Cylon “Six” on Battlestar Galactica, shown here with Dale Denham, the guy who once lamented to me that he had never made an appearance on my blog. Well, Dale, the ship has sailed on your anonymity! ; )


Candace Hershey, director of ESP and Dale Denham, Senior vice President — separately, they’re characters; together, they are pistols!

Here, ASI’s President’s Council — the group of senior vice presidents who lead the company and report directly to Tim Andrews — yucking it up to “YMCA” by the Village People, led by Rich Fairfield (left) and senior vice president Dale Denham, someone who never met a mic he didn’t like. ; )


Oh, let me count the ways that I love these boys. Both Jason Kuttner (left) and Tim Glen are charter members — along with my pal Jeremy Young — of “The Joy Stick Club,” as I call ASI’s LAN technology department (due to their rabid adoration of video games like “Quake”), but they are so much more. Jason is the life-saver I call when I’m in places like Guangzhou and Hong Kong when my Blackberry (and I) are melting down. And though there’s not much he can do to placate my psycho state, he always knows how to fix the Crackberry. And Mr. Glen, this boy is one of those wicked-smart people who has sick computer skills and basically keeps ASI’s entire internal technology network up and running. Succinctly, he is totally bad-ass. Rock on, Mr. Glen… ; )


American Idol finalist Justin Guarini — and his Very Prominent Hair — hosted the evening’s events that featured 15 karaoke events.


Justin Guarini, breaks out the guitar to accompany marketing manager Kate Malone, a true signing talent who fronts a band. Kate’s choice of karaoke song was Natalie Merchant, one of my favorites.


Powered Up in Palm Beach

Filed under: Editorial, Travel

Hi Everyone –

Having just returned from the amazing Breakers in Palm Beach Florida (click here to see a link of my pal Joe Haley, star of The Joe Show, giving a tour of the property) where ASI held its second annual Power Summit, I can tell you it was not only a fabulously fun time, but one that was incredibly informative as well. Yes, of course there were lots of networking events like golf, tennis, cocktail parties and festive dinners, but the education seminars (click here to see the event’s agenda) definitely took center stage as the over 200 industry professionals in attendance expressed their concerns over the economy and how it will affect our industry in 2009.  Heather DiPrato, ASI’s vice president of distributor sales, and I moderated a breakout session discussion titled “Outlook for 2009.” In it were 32 owners and executives from the Counselor Top 40 suppliers and distributors, and here are some of the most telling responses, determined by a show of hands, to questions Heather posed as I was taking notes:

1. How do you anticipate that your company’s sales will end up in 2008?

Up 0-9%: 2

Up 10% or more: None

Down 0-5%: 21

Down 10% or more: 7

*Two people did not respond

2. What are your sales projections for 2009?

Up 0-9%: 1

Up 10% or more: None

Down 0-5%: 17

Down 5-10%: 14

Down more than 10%: None

3. When do you foresee solid industry growth again?

Anytime in 2009? 4

In 2010? 16

In 2011? 10

In 2012? 2

That said, people are being very strategic and savvy in how they allocate their resources. In the panel I moderated on Monday morning (”Why Marketing Matters: Secrets to Building Buzz”), my panelists (David Nicholson, president of Counselor Top 40 supplier Leed’s, Ross Silverstein, owner of Counselor Top 40 distributor iPROMOTEu, Tom Riordan, CEO of Maple Ridge Farms and Danny Rosin, co-owner of distributor BrandFuel) all said they would not be reducing their marketing efforts (and, in fact, may be increasing them), despite the economy. The reason, as David said, was to spend more on marketing as a competitive strategy to gain market share. Danny, who — with his partner Robert Fiveash — has used online marketing with great success to grow their business, pointed out that there is no cost involved with posting promotional videos on such sites as YouTube to generate buzz for your company (click here to see some hilarious videos BrandFuel has done).

But I think the most illuminating portion of the event was when Melinda Ligos, ASI’s editor-in-chief, announced the results of our exclusive Advertising Specialties Impressions Study, which is a cost analysis of promotional products versus other advertising media. Talk about eye-opening! While we all know how powerful and impactful ad specialties are, these survey results (click here to download a PDF of the survey) really make the case for them being the marketing medium of choice. The one point that blew me away? The average cost per impression (CPI) of an ad specialty item is $0.004! Bags, apparel, writing instruments and desk accessories all rank high on the list of the number of impressions per month.    

And now, lest you think it was ALL business at the Power Summit, here’s a sampling of photos (which in some cases could be called “evidence”) from the event. Incidentally, at every industry function I attend, I try to meet five new people. My favorites from the Power Summit?

* Joyce Johnson-Miller, co-founder of Relativity Capital LLC and chairwoman of the board for Counselor Top 40 supplier Norwood. She is as whip-smart as she is hilarious and gregarious. LOVE her!

* Danny Rosin and Robert Fiveash, co-founders of North Carolina-based BrandFuel (one of ASI’s “Fastest Growing Distributorships”). Not only are they wickedly funny and creative, their partying is on an epic, Dionysian level. Rock on, boys.

* Barry Deutsch, vice president of the number one distributor on Counselor’s Top 40 list, BDA. Oh my, where to begin… Not only was my conversation with him about the state — and future — of the industry one of the best I’ve had in a long time, his love and affection for Grey Goose rivals mine. If he wasn’t already engaged, I’d propose.

* And last, but certainly not least, I have a new favorite ASI colleague, Colin Graf. Colin has been with ASI for almost two years and is one of our mah-velous marketing managers. But, because he’s pretty low-key and all stealthy with his partying (and because, let’s face it, I’m self-absorbed and tend to suck the oxygen out of a room when I’m in it) we’ve never really hung out. Not anymore… Colin, my friend, due directly to your scintillating personality at the Power Summit, you and I will be reveling at future events. In the words of one of my favorites, the legendary writer Hunter S. Thompson: “Crazies always find each other.” ; )

Enjoy the photos and more next week!

Cheers!

– M

Ellen and Tom Vann, owner of Target Graphics, on their first night at the Breakers. They also celebrated their 10th wedding anniversary, so congratulations to them! Industry celebs Brandon Mackay and Charley Johnson from SnugZ are number 38 on this year’s Counselor Power 50 list. (To see the complete “Power 50 list,” click here….)
My pal Tim O’Boyle (aka “Ringo”), left, vice president of sales for JournalBooks (ASI’s “Supplier of the Year” for 2008 as voted on by distributors) and the always-charming Kris Robinson, vice president of marketing for Counselor Top 40 distributor PromoShop. A new pal, Keith Simon, vice president of sales for Media Tree, prepares to down a shot of Sambuca with his fingers on fire. For the record, Keith was not the only one to engage in this activity: At the urging of PromoShop’s Kris Robinson (always the instigator!), there were five of us (and yes, I was one of them) who dipped our fingers in the licorice liqueur, lit them on fire, raised them over our heads and declared ourselves to be the “Statues of Liberty.” Being with Kris, I’m always reminded of the famous line uttered by Lady Cardine Lamb about the prodigious partier Lord Byron: “He’s mad, bad and dangerous to know.” Kisses, Kris! ; )
Fred Parker, president of North Carolina-based Bluegrass Promotions, and I have been friends for more than 10 years. In that time, Fred has always stayed just as fun and maintained his youthful verve. It is only a matter of time before I, on the other hand, begin looking “flamboyantly haggard” — like Endorra from Bewitched. Industry luminaries Tad Webster, vice president of CounselorTop 40 distributor PromoShop with Fran “The Man” Ford, an industry consultant and partner in Vaquero Meat and Provisions.
(From left): Ira Neaman, owner of Counselor Top 40 supplier Vantage, Barry Deutsch, executive vice president of Counselor Top 40 distributor BDA and JournalBooks’ Tim O’Boyle with me on Sunday night. Few things make me as happy as having my favorite fun boys sit with me at dinner! My gal pal Bonni Shevin-Sandy, executive vice presence of CounselorTop 40 supplier Dard and a member of this year’s Power 50 list, at dinner on Monday night. Bonni is my go-to chica on the topics of product safety and internationalism — my girl knows her stuff!
Adding to the industry’s “glam factor” are Dard’s Nadia George (left) and my BFF Bonni Sandy — they’re definitely two of the industry’s pretty people! Dard’s Nadia George, shown here with, Craig Calloway, the CEO of Counselor Top 40 distributor eComapnyStore. Craig is #19 on this year’s Power 50 list, which is beyond impressive because it’s his first appearance on the list. Way to go, Craig!
The face that launched a thousand shirtless bar dances… BrandFuel’s Robert Fiveash was one of the straws that stirred the cocktail of mayhem on Monday night, along with my beloved Dan Townes from Shepenco, BrandFuel’s Danny Rosin, my pals Jakey Krolick and Colin Graf from ASI’s marketing department. Stories of Robert and Dan dancing on the bar at an off-site, undisclosed location percolated through the Power Summit on Tuesday morning. Many (myself included) were envious that we missed what sounded like a rollicking good time. (From left): PromoShop’s Tad Webster and Kris Robinson, along with Chuck Fandos, president of Gateway/CDI and Memo Kahan, my Patron Saint of Patrone and the owner of PromoShop. When this group gets together, the good times roll so hard and fast the Earth shifts off its axis.
Shepenco’s Dan Townes (#41 on this year’s Power 50 list), Fields Manufacturing’s Matt Bertram, ASI editor-in-chief Melinda Ligos and Dave Regan from Counselor Top 40 distributor The Vernon Co. enjoy some quiet time after the dinner on Monday night when Counselor’s Power 50 list was announced. Counselor managing editor, star of The Joe Show, one of my “work husbands” (though he perpetually wants a divorce), Joe Haley (right), with Target Graphics’ Tom Vann, one of Joe’s industry BFFs.
Oh, let me count the ways how I love Chuck Fandos, president of Counselor Top 40 distributor Gateway/CDI and a newcomer to this year’s Power 50 list at number 32. Chuck called me not too long ago, and lamented the fact that he was lacking a “nickname from Michele Bell.” Consequently, he is henceforth known as “Chuckles” or “MotherChucker,” depending on the sassiness of my mood. ; ) ASI’s senior vice president Dale Denham, looking visibly nervous that I’m that close to him with a camera, on Sunday afternoon in the Mediterranean courtyard at the Breakers. Dale’s birthday was on Monday so we wish him a belated Happy Birthday!
During one of Joe Haley’s impromptu “talk show” videos (which we immediately destroy afterwards), he interviews ASI’s Dan Dienna (far left), Colin Graf and Gene Rahill (to my right). With the level of discourse among this group, the answer to the question “Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader?” would be a resounding and emphatic “No.” ; ) Because we were in Palm Beach, FL for ASI’s second annual Power Summit, the other senior editors and I hosted this week’s ASI Radio show live from The Breakers (in Kathy Huston’s room, no less). From the left, here are Joe Haley, Andy Cohen, Kathy and Melinda Ligos showing just how close they really are. My favorite part of this photo? The expressions on Joe’s and Andy’s faces that say, “this is amusing, though profoundly unnerving.”

ASI’s marketing maverick Jake Krolick has the singular talent of either looking like a rock star (left) or a depraved loony (above) in every photo I take of him.

ASI president and CEO Tim Andrews, shown here with ASI’s marketing manager Jake Krolick. At one point during dinner, Tim asked everyone at the table what would be the one karaoke song we’d each sing. Before I could answer, he looked at me and said, “Michele, you’re Cher and you’d be singing ‘Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves.’ ” I, of course, take that as the ultimate compliment. ; )
Because we broadcast the ASI Radio show from Kathy Huston’s hotel room, we had to make due with wacky accommodations. Here, ASI managing editor Joe Haley buffers the luggage rack he’s sitting on with Kathy’s pillow.
(From left): ASI editor-in-chief Melinda Ligos, managing editor Joe Haley, senior vice president and publisher Rich Fairfield and Advantages editor Kathy Huston at dinner on our first night at the Breakers. ASI’s Joe Haley (left) and Dan Dienna, two grown men who make each other giggle like 12-year-old girls.
ASI’s senior vice president and publisher Rich Fairfield and ASI’s senior vice president of marketing, Susanne Curry, at a wickedly wacky event hosted by company president and CEO Tim Andrews for ASI staffers who worked the Power Summit, on Saturday evening. Colin Graf, my new favorite character at ASI (center), with Dan Dienna, ASI’s Supplier Internet Sales Manager and our marketing department’s Heather Roberts. ASI’s marketing team is the best I’ve ever worked with and really did a spectacular job working behind the scenes to put the Power Summit together.
ASI’s trade show manager Amber May, our super-special event planner who we’ll call Captain Fabulous (triple-snaps to you for a first-class job, Babycakes!) and Jakey Krolick (again, with the bad boy/rock star face) enjoying some downtime before the start of the Summit. (From left): Joanne Lynch, ASI’s director of education, Chicago-based Hilary Dolphin, who works with the ASI Show team and my colleague Kathy Huston, the “editrix” of Advantages. Kathy’s office is next to mine, and when we both cackle loudly in sync, the windows shatter (and grown men cry) at ASI.
Two of my favorite editorial colleagues, Joe Haley and Kathy Huston. And yes, Joe Haley is as loud as his shirt.

Moments that Make Me Ask, “WTF?”

Filed under: Fun, Personal

Hey from Philly, where it’s chilly today but everyone’s on fire reveling in our first World Series win in 28 years! Lots of people are taking the day off to enjoy the celebration parade through downtown Philly, but I’m here, applying red lipstick to my work BFF Joe Haley and brushing his bouffant. (Here he is, in all his glory, with editor-in-chief Melinda Ligos as Daphne from Scooby Doo.) Let me just say this: Joe is not a pretty little lady… .

Joe

Joe

I’ve only dressed in a Halloween costume at ASI once — last year — and it was so ironic in a disturbing, unnerving way that I don’t think I could ever top it. See photo below…

Sacrilicious

Exemplifying the concept of “irony at its finest,” this was my costume for last year’s ASI Editorial Department Halloween Contest. And yes, “Sister Sacrilicious” unnerved the hell out of countless colleagues… Christian Brandt, my pal who’s the executive director of distributor services, wouldn’t even stand next to me for fear of lightening striking and, well, eternal damnation.

I’m going to do a blog posting early next week featuring my favorite products of 2008, which I’m gathering now, so stay tuned for that.

In the meantime, though, can I have a moment of your time to regale you with some of the “WTF?” (”What the Frak?”) moments I’ve encountered lately? And yes, I’m well aware that I spend WAY too much time mulling over this nonsense…

1. Recently, my friend Jeremy Young and I went out for cocktails. Jeremy is the one who keeps our e-mails and server functioning at optimum capacity here at ASI and the one I whine to first when something’s wrong with my beloved Blackberry. We’re also big Sci-Fi dorks and political junkies, so our conversations vacillate between the substantive (how and why the next president’s Supreme Court choices will have a monumental impact on our society) and the weapons-grade wacky (who’s the fifth Cylon on Battlestar Galactica and the brilliance of Jean-Luc Picard as a starship commander…). As I’d had one wine over my limit the night we went out, I curled up in the back of my car, wrapped in my fur coat like a cat, to take a nap. Upon waking up, all refreshed, alert and looking fabulous with a nickel stuck to my cheek, I drove to the nearest 24-hour convenience store to get coffee. First, they had no coffee, because second, they had just opened. Twenty-four hour convenience? I think not… Teases.

2. I bought one of GE’s eco-friendly “Energy Smart” lightbulbs last week — you know, the squiggly ones shaped like fusilli pasta — that are supposed to be more efficient and do less harm to the environment. All well and good, except… the decidedly not so eco-friendly over-sized plastic packaging that was so difficult to open, I broke a nail and cut my finger. Consequently, my blue language offset my green efforts. So while I applaud GE’s new lightbulbs and am fascinated by their shape, does the plastic packaging encasing the bulb have to be twice the size? Really?

3. I’m a big fan of Panera for a quick lunch — their broccoli & cheese soup is delish! However, when you order a sandwich — made on their famous thick, crusty bread — they give you a choice of two sides: potato chips or… bread. So I’ll have a side of bread with my bread, please? You gotta love a company that so flagrantly ignores the nutritional pyramid chart.

4. In case you didn’t know, Pennsylvania, a state founded on Quaker ethics and beliefs, has really odd and restrictive laws for selling alcoholic beverages. For example, you can’t buy beer and liquor in the same place, and certainly not in some convenient establishment like a grocery store, where you’re buying other staples. If you want beer you have to go to a beer distributor, where you can only buy beer by the case or keg — no six-packs unless you go to a deli or pizza place; if you want liquor, you go to a liquor store — or “Spirits Shoppe” as some, like my pal Jeremy, call them in an effort to sound less heathen-like. Got it? Now you know why we all drink so much in PA — we’re annoyed and confused…

So, one would naturally think that a PA liquor store would be the model of buttoned-up, conservative propriety. Apparently not. On my weekly pilgrimage (as Jeremy calls it) for supplies, a very nice lady who looked as if she should be presiding over a PTA meeting stood behind a fold-out card table offering patrons samples of Patrone tequila shots and margaritas. “Would you like a couple of shots and a margarita or two, hun?,” she asked me. Two things: First, she served up the sauce under a large sign that said, “Never Drink and Drive.” Now, unless you live in the back room of the liquor store (tempting…), don’t the majority of customers drive?

Second, I had to explain to her that while the offer to throw some tequila back with her was enticing, the chances that she would have to bundle me up in a shopping cart and wheel me home were quite high.

5. A very nice industry apparel supplier I know sent me a super-soft and fashionable T-shirt from one of his new lines as a gift. The problem? The size and cut were made for someone with the body of a 12-year-old gymnast. What’s fascinating to me is that the supplier knows me well and has spent time with me, certainly enough to be familiar with my body type. So while I thank him for the gracious gesture, I would ask that wearables suppliers consider that some chicas have curves and spongy girl parts when sending out sample sizes. ; )

Any brow-furrowing “What the Frak?” moments for you? Feel free to share!

More next week when I share my favorite products of the year!

Cheers!
– M


Economics for Rummies

Filed under: Editorial, Personal

Hi Everyone!

First, I’d like to thank ASI managing editor Joan Chaykin for contributing to my blog with her coverage from the AdvantagesRoadshow through Southern California two weeks ago. It was a smart move for the Powers That Be here at ASI to send Joan instead of me — Tijuana is dangerously close to San Diego (one of the show’s stops) and the potential for mayhem involved with me crossing the border into the Tequila hot zone causes the phrase ”International Incident” to leap to mind.  

Second, I’m sure you — like me — have been riveted by the daily “breaking news” stories about the economic crisis. The difference is, you probably understand it better than I do, as the depth of what I know about finance could fit into a shot glass. Math (and, by default, economics and finance) was never my strong suit. When I took the college SATs, my verbal scores were off the charts; by contrast, my math scores were so bad that my high school guidance counselor called my mother, Judge Judye (she doesn’t wear a robe or have a gavel, but she is judgemental… ; ) ), expressing concern that I was mentally deficient.

Consequently, when circumstances like the housing debacle, the stock market’s recent nausea-inducing wild ride (”Wall Street’s worst week ever,” financial analysts wailed) and the credit crunch happen in unison, I get that it’s the biggest financial nightmare scenario of our time. What I don’t often get is the whys, the hows, and what it means for consumers and businesses. But thank God, like FDR, I have my own brain trust of industry finance wonks who patiently guide me through the mire. Michael Bernstein, Counselor Top 40 supplier Polyconcept North America’s CEO, is the Annie Sullivan to my Helen Keller when it comes to economics; Jonathan Isaacson, owner of Counselor Top 40 supplier Gemline, has been taking my daily calls, helping me understand the continuously shifting financial landscape in a way that I get (”If Congress doesn’t sign the bailout plan, Michele, head to the nearest bunker and stock up on your Grey Goose because it’s going to get ugly…”); and Craig Nadel, president of Counselor Top 40 distributor Jack Nadel Int’l., who reads Warren Buffet’s shareholder report just for fun and used to schedule his vacations so he could attend Berkshire Hathaway’s shareholder meetings in Omaha. Craig definitely has a man-crush on Warren Buffet… (”But did you read the shareholder report I sent you?,” he’ll ask me. “He’s so funny and gosh, just smart as a whip!”). Between the three of them, it’s like having my own elite advisory board to the Fed.

Michael, Jonathan and Craig all share the same outlook for the economy and the ad specialty industry: If your company’s sales are flat right now, then you’re doing pretty damn good. The fourth quarter is going to be tough, and next year is going to be a rough ride for both the economy and the industry. The National Small Business Association reports that 67% of small-business owners surveyed in August said they’ve been impacted by the credit crunch, and 63% said they’ve been hit by worsening credit card terms. In the upcoming November issue of Counselor, my colleague Andy Cohen (he’s our in-house go-to guy for all financial issues and knows his stuff), the magazine’s editor, tackles these topics in a feature article that offers options, strategies and some surprisingly optimistic views from a few of the industry’s best and brightest on how to shore up your business. Andy also points to some positive economic indicators that show there are areas where things may be looking up.   

Jonathan Isaacson, during one of his tutorials with me last week, made a great observation: “Relief isn’t going to come quickly,” he said. “It took a while for us to get here, and it will take a while for us to get out. However, I’m assuming this economic crisis will end at some point. So while I do think it’s likely we will be in a recession, companies may decide to market their way out of it to get new business and increase sales. This industry would benefit from that and be up again. Once companies feel comfortable that there is an end in sight, the situation will ease and spending will increase.”

For me, I agree with Jonathan’s assessment — it’ll be rough, but we’ll get through it — and will continue to have a glass-half-full outlook. Possibly because the glass is always half-full of vodka.

More later this week!

Cheers!

– Michele

PS: Thanks to all of you who offered names for my two kittens — your suggestions were funny, fabulous and just cracked me up. The kittens are no longer nameless: The male is “Monkey” and the female is “Mouse” (she’s really tiny and she squeaks instead of meowing!). I did notice and appreciate, however, the preponderance of suggestions that I name them after brands of liquor and shoes… ; )   


Checking Out of Hotel California

Filed under: ASI Shows, Travel


My last day in sunny L.A. was bittersweet. I was excited to get home to the family, but I had such a nice time chatting with the exhibitors and attendees, that it was hard to pull myself away and make the short trip to LAX. (I actually cut it pretty close, not realizing how they herd hapless travelers outside before even reaching security.)

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